Group Dynamic

In an earlier post, I wrote of the value of picking up the phone to ask for help, information, or other assistance from fellow professionals.

What do you do when you get that call?

Share.  Abundantly.

In my former Read the rest of this entry »

A few weeks ago, I shared an unusual incident involving an appliance installer, and the Facebook discussion after I shared it online.

After the post, there was a bit more discussion, and I also finally offered my thoughts on the issue.  This week, I’ll Read the rest of this entry »

We’re just a few days past the Winter Solstice, the shortest darkest day of the year. A contrast to the holiday season, it can exacerbate hidden internal sadness in those around us.

I love Christmas music.  But not all of it at the same level of love.  I prefer minor keys, obscure pieces, and bleak moods that reflect peace and/or sadness.  ”God Rest Ye Merry” is a good one, as is “‘Twas in the Moon of Wintertime.”  Lots of good stuff in the French tradition.

My two favorite Christmas music albums are “A Charlie Brown Christmas” and “If on a Winter’s Night…”  The latter comes from Sting, who hits on a major theme of this time of year in the liner notes:

…I have an ambivalent attitude towards the celebration of Christmas.  For many, it is a period of intense loneliness and alienation… Winter is a time of darkness and introspection… [and] the gravitational pull of home that Christmas exerts on the traveller.

Walking amid the snows of Winter, or sitting entranced in a darkened room gazing at the firelight, usually evokes in me a mood of reflection, a mood that can be at times philosophical, at other wildly irrational; I find myself haunted by memories.

This can be a joyful and jolly time of year; so many lights and happy music and gatherings. But many folks are like Sting; haunted by memories of sadness exacerbated by the short dark days and the contrast with the flaunting of joy.

Enjoy the season – the lights, music, gatherings, festivities – but please stay sensitive. And allow yourself to feel the melancholy, too.  That can add to the beauty.

Happy New Year.

Yesterday, while working in my home office, workers from a local store came to install a new appliance.  I overheard a shocking conversation that struck me as inappropriate.  I selected a typical excerpt, and posted it on my personal Facebook page to see what conversation would ensue.  I was not disappointed. This was an interesting exchange that touched on Read the rest of this entry »

Hannah was a young person volunteering at a community dinner.  She sure seemed like she didn’t want to be there.  She was listening to her iPod and had earbuds in both ears as she served peas to the public.  She was surrounded by about twenty adult volunteers.

At one point, Harold, one of the adult volunteers, finally said something.  He scowled, and Read the rest of this entry »

As promised, this week’s blog is inspired by Veteran’s Day last week.  These are two stories of veterans that I told at a local Memorial Day service this year.  What’s the lesson?  There may be more than one, but let’s lift humility out of this.  No war hero brags; in fact, they share the credit with others.  If these guys can share the credit for these accomplishments, surely we Read the rest of this entry »

When I was young teacher, I often found myself in the middle of student disputes. My response was always something along the lines of “you need to learn how to solve your own problems.” I was thinking I was doing them a service by empowering them grow up and solve problems on their own. In reality, I was avoiding drama myself, and being selfish. Leaders of organizations need Read the rest of this entry »

Decades ago, Walter Wangerin wrote a brilliant story about the way our approach can make a big difference in the lives of others – it was the main influencer of my credo “Everything you do makes a person’s day better or worse.  What are you going to do with that power?”

It’s called Edification/Demolition, you can read it in 3 minutes, and it’s here: http://www.simpleacts.org/capsules/edification.htm

The format of that story — same setting, two different kinds of experiences — has been replicated in my life.  Almost eerie, but cool.  So – my real-life version follows. Read the rest of this entry »

Last week, I visited with someone close to my age (40s) about people in their 20s. The topic of generational differences came up, and I was reminded of the pervasiveness of the current stereotype many of us have about people in their 20s:

Entitled, lazy, hyper-connected, always with the earbuds in, leaving work as soon as possible, doing the minimum necessary, always Read the rest of this entry »

A major shift in my teaching effectiveness occurred after I absorbed and applied “The Leadership Challenge” by Kouzes and Posner. I especially embraced their concepts of “inspiring a shared vision” and “encouraging the heart” as ways to increase my own effectiveness at rallying students to stay attentive and hard-working. Being enthusiastic and affirming as a way of doing things, which is the opposite of what I had done before, was like changing the world from black and white to being in color. This shift marked a measurable difference in my engagement of students.

And yet, every once in a while, I would be frustrated Read the rest of this entry »

Sometime, when people are urged to take a positive approach to leadership, there is some push-back. Some people seem to equate “positivity” with being super-nice, but being kind is much deeper than a spewing of empty compliments like “good job” or “nice work” or “super!”

You can’t be too kind. But, you can be too soft. That is the difference, and I’ll admit that I have had trouble sometimes helping folks understand the difference. I just read Good to Great and have taken quite a liking to Jim Collins’s phrase “rigorous, not ruthless.” This is the message for leaders who would like to be positive. In fact, participants in Group Dynamic workshops are often trained in the art of “behavior –> outcome” statements. (Covered in an earlier post). This focus on behavior, and the high standards of the organization, can be done in a way that is positive, not negative. In a way that is rigorous, not ruthless. Read the rest of this entry »

Cut people some slack.  Really, you never know what kind of a day they’re having, how bad their insomnia is, whether they’ve suffered a major loss, or whatever other darkness they carry.

Paul had an iPod in class, and earbuds in his ears.  This is a no-no, and standard procedure is to temporarily confiscate it for the day.  I reached out my hand, and he gave me a steely glare and said “It’s mine.  I’m NOT handing it to you.”

Uh-oh. Read the rest of this entry »